Japan Lover

Ode at Dawn

Posted on: 16 June 2009

Kanji for word ai, namely love

Kanji for word ai, namely love

Very early morning…

I didn’t really sleep much this past night.

Weather still challengin, from the window out of Chateau I can see it could be another cloudy day.

I don’t care.

I feel so… changing inside.

Just hours ago I was writing two posts addressed to the Lakers’ blog, almost at 2 am. It’s like I don’t feel the need to sleep in this town, at all.

Karim woke up and started to cuddle me, in that explicit and demanding way he always keeps out to be so charming and gently addressing.

We started to make love and ended two hours later.

He fell on the bed and let himself become a Morpheus’ child, and I kept watchin him for I think another half an hour, before falling as well in sweet rest.

Yes, you’ve heard it correctly: I stared at him half an hour. Just watchin him breathe, and live.

And I felt I lacked nothing.

I did previously but lately is like… I feel it like it’s meant to.

Maybe my crazy days are over.

I don’t know.

I should face a will, a treat, a thrill to say so.

Fact is I don’t search anything like that. And my antics have never been so quiet, you know.

Pizzeria MozzaWhen we were at Mozza the other day, I had to walk through the bath at a certain point; as I had my way out from the private room, there was this actor model whatever who tried to ask me my digits and being cute.

Really: he was just my type.


Perfect body, face…nice manners too.

He was screaming “good sex trial” to me. And this just barely three months ago, before Easter would have been enough for even start a makin out session in that same bathroom, for all I care about being “good girl”.

But my playing days are just… not here anymore. I said  politely, and smiling I was in company. He replied “I know, it’s a couple of days I see you at  Chateau Marmont with that guy”.

I felt flattered.

I felt like I normally do when beautiful people with taste reckon I am just no ordinary girl, and I can catch in their eyes they’d like to taste my own thing. But still, even though he was my undoubted type… I didn’t want to play.

Cos the one who was waiting at the table, the one whom I have watched breathing and live this past night, he’s also and incredibly my type.

Don’t wanna play him in no way. Which is incredible, for anyone who has really got to know me, the “no commitment one” in charge.

Karim keeps saying he will allow me just one crazy gesture in my life. And we all know whom that shot is aimed at. Mashudo (he has fully recovered from the threesome of the past trip to Cali gameplay, luckely, and now there’s no more awkward tension between him and Karim, which I am so very happy of, having been the one asking for that oversexy and frankly AWESOME game…) said the other day at the phone he should ban me from that too, and I might accept.

He’s wrong, I wouldn’t. Prince A. is just… you know… My complete shattering, uttermost, totally insane thing. See? Even now if I think of it I shake. And I must stop, cos this is not space for that, now.

But what really makes me think Karim might be my one is that he actually understands nobody can fight a dream, but he also understands reality is destined to take over any dream in the end.

That’s why I truly feel something unparalleled for him, something I never thought I would for anyone yet. He understands me. He accepts me for who I am. He waited for me to understand this. And even though I can’t get what he finds in me that matches this all he’s able to give to me, I can’t stop smiling.

I can’t stop watchin him.

I can’t stop feeling so perfectly with him.

Today we’ve scrapped the lates house seeing cos we will sign for the houses we did fall in love with straight.

Tomorrow we will sleep barely, and we will reach the Coliseum at dawn, so that by the time the gates open we will be in first line to live a spectacular morning of pure and shining glory (you can’t camp around: anyway, Karim said to me I don’t have to worry. His family reaches LA also that day, and they have “connections”. I never doubted it).

I hope weather gets better.

But even under a shore, I would feel like I am the blessed bitch that I am.

I’m not very religious, you know. But it’s been a while everyday I feel like I have to thank above Highest Sky for this incredible life that I am living. I am a very spoiled 24 years old. Dunno why I got all this. But I am surely trying to treasure it all.

Have all a wonderful day. Gotta give Karim a special wake up call.


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5'9'', Size 2 madhead in love with life, crushing over Japan, Music, and Kobe Bean Bryant.

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